It was like a mary poppins bag, except a sexual mary poppins bag.
There's a girl in my class named "La-a" pronouced "Luh Dash uh" I hate everyone
so i just drove past a racoon and a kid on a long board... god i love 4am white castle runs
Dad just showed up on someone else's golf cart, filled an ice chest with booze and left while yelling "SHINANIGANS!!!!" this is going no where fast.
We made out a little and then he gave me some weed. I would say it was a pretty productive stop on my way home
I totally OverDed on K2 last night. I felt like I was made of lead and then I had a panic attack.
The only difference between us and a pack of 14 year old girls is substance abuse
And I threw up 26 times yesterday. I actually think I threw up a spider too.
He was nothing but deer-caught-in-headlight eyes and dick, it was adorable
the worst fight me and my gf ever had was over Guy fieri
Can I get my morals surgically removed?
I just found your shirt hanging in a tree 4 blocks from the party...in the opposite direction of your house. where are you going?
I called him the wrong name all night, yet I still got a ride home from the party and hooked up with the guy. I'm irresistible.
I'm at this party and a blind kid just walked in and asked "where is the fucking pong table"
It was very surreal. They were listening to a religious podcast on morality while they both went down on me.
Randomize
