what do you mean I googled how to give an awesome blow job?
the way she shouted out instructions during sex made me feel like I was having sex with my gym teacher
During sex she told me I could do anything I wanted to her. You remember that toy lightsaber we bought at Wal Mart?
Bad news. Pictures just stimulated my memory and i just realized the stripper I hooked up with this weekend tasted like pizza.
does pizza still have the 5 second rule in the bubble bath?
Thanks for talking me down from peeing on his window last night.
I am now curious as to how you would have aimed.
I thought he wouldn't talk to me again. You know, what's that saying "why buy the cow when you can fuck it six hours after meeting"
I think it says something about my life when I start picking up girls while im in rehab. And I don't think it's good.
Fuck away man. Like 3% of these new people will be back next week. This is the best week of the year to slam bitches at the gym.
after he went down on me he said he wanted an air freshener for his car scented like my vag. i cant even.
legit question. can i put a condom down our garbage disposal? my rents are coming over in 20
GOD DAMMIT TARYN WHY DO WE ALWAYS HAVE TO ROB PLACES IN OUR FUTURE PLANS?!
Pro: She likes to masturbate to 50 shades of grey. Con: She reads 50 Shades of grey non-ironically.
We had sex on a dog bed..
We took vodka shots. You kept saying it was the key to your heart.
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