i want you to feel like i'm letting you into my heart, not just my vagina.
dont try to nair your balls. i speak from experience
So Ive been fucking her for the past couple months and i just found our that my grandfather and her grandmother were fuck buddies for a while. I feel like this is a new awesome family tradition that skips a generation.
her facebook pictures are like a timeline of all the guys she's screwed.
her moans were so awkward that i kept asking "what" when she'd say my name...
He just walked into my room in a robe with a cooking pot of cereal.
Just found out my 21st birthday is on a Wednesday. The possibilities are cheap, as well as endless.
She passed out in his mom's bed and when we went to go get her she went 'no its cool I live here'.
All I have done at work today is eat and try to get my coworker to tie me to his bed again
Guess who just got a Christian Beliefs class to seriously discuss the spiritual implications of dolphin rape?
we had a full conversation and he only brought up drugs twice. overall I'd call it a success
I feel like I could get pregnant watching Zac Efron do yard work in this movie
THERE IS A VERY SMALL CHILD YELLING OUTSIDE OF MY DOOR. THE NEXT TIME YOU TELL ME YOUR TOO BIG FOR A CONDOM I'M GOING TO PUNCH YOU IN THE DICK.
Hey, you can never be fully sure you're straight until you jerk off to gay porn
Nothing like having a family watch you dry heave at the end of the dock
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