I'm pretty sure if an eight year old calls you a whore.. it's true. just saying.
the way i see it, im about one adderall binge away from graduating
No He hasn't done that since the time he came in his own eye
Sprained my ankle at sky zone REST ICE COMPRESSION ELEVATION AND SHOTS it'll all feel better soon
Someone spilled vodka all over the elevator floor. Bring straws.
It was fun until the stripper told me it was her first day and started crying.
I left the guinea pigs on the dryer. Make sure to take care of them.
Since the world is still here you can go ahead and disregard those pictures I sent
He goes to Columbia so regardless of how he looks I should fuck him right?
I came to the party for him. I don't know where he went, but I mentioned being hungry and his housemate brought me a huge tupperware container of berry cobbler. I think I'll stay.
I wound up running down the street in 12 degree weather in just my bra and then fell asleep cuddling my bottle. You tell me how last night went.
You thought there were zombies attacking us so you tried to tuck and roll out of a moving vehicle. Also you should consider wearing underwear
I feel like my cat and I are playing mind games. I need more friends.
And I'm laying here struggling with the notion that I need to put pants on.
So now I'm just going to brush my teeth, get high, and go to sleep. Like an adult
Randomize
