Have fun with your cool freestyling girlfriend!
She can rap better than you any day
This girl is more easily done than said...
No better way to find a friend than to offer cyber sex and see what happens
Laughlin, where retired strippers come to die.
Blowing lines off from the book where the wild things are... bad babysitter?
she insisted that i refer to her boobs by name.
Ok lesson learned. Don't lick the spoon when making mushroom chocolates. The kitchen walls are melting.
Come over and play the Jeter 3000 drinking game. You drink if the commentators say "captain" or "3000". I'll drink if they say "overrated" or "past his prime".
A zombie called me motorboat central while participating in an auction to motorboat my tits. he then proceeded to propose, insisting that he makes alot money.
THIS NIGHT WILL NOT GO DICKLESS
I know you're on vacation but you should know I just walk of shamed through a hotel lobby while leaving a threesome on Friday the 13th. Fuck superstition, I win.
Can we do a version of last night where I actually remember shit?
What changed your mind?
Being sober
My month off booze swimsuit season diet plan is working well. Plus I'm learning so much about my house, did you know a girl named Meagan lives here?
There are both cum and chocolate stains on my sheets. Can't decide whether this is a new low or a new high.
Randomize
