I want to bang chis in dee ass burt he be hating on me times two. Me be tryin ti love onu
Bendover
hot pretzels for dinner, snacks, and now breakfast...oh to be a poor college student...everyday is like a carnival.
I got her a Nickelback box set.
I feel like I could be a daytime drinking legend, like they could put that shit on my tombstone and right now your preventing me from reaching my full potential
I just spiked the applesauce. Try to tell me again your party is better.
I made my rape whistle into a roach clip device. FRESHMAN YEAR!
Fuck you, jack daniels. I feel like satan laid an egg in my brain.
I got written up at work for smelling like sex and vodka. Still not sure how they put that into professional terms.
So I'm guessing that puking on a camper is a straight path to instant termination?
You passed out in your dogs bed and you only willingly woke up because I told there was a bottle of vodka and a snickers bar waiting for you upstairs
I've made a single handle of rum last like three weeks and my mom hasn't even acknowledged it.
i refuse to sex anyone who doesn't get my lord of the rings references. no exceptions.
he just fucked me for my cheese..
Idk... I'm not sure why anyone would use a flesh light in general. Let alone hook it up to a wifi device.
im on a boat
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