I have been thinking about it and I am really glad we decided to order helmets.
Hawaiian shirts and no dignity
We are always on the same wavelength...kinda eerie.
Feel like bed is flying. Not sure where we're going. Hope there is candy.
He probably put up nude pics. He seems like that kind of guy.
I was drunk at peters. now im drunk at my apartment. and hungry. but mcdonalds is broken. wtf
I forgot how few teeth there are in this state...
They are making fun of natty and blackberries.
Tell them they are ugly.
It's amazing I mean I blew that senator just for him to deny me marriage.... Politics suck and he swallowed!
It's okay. I've dumbed down my notes over the semester because I knew I wouldn't be up to understanding things come finals.
Goldenshlager is a hell of a drink. And these are the adventures ur missing out on w me. I gave someone a bath Emily. A BATH.
Awkward
Can't say I wouldn't let it happen again.
I made people serenade her before talking to her and went on a condom run. If I'm going to be in the friend zone, I'm going to be its fucking king.
Who breaks their ankle the day before a beach wedding? This guy. Maybe this is karma for fucking someone's wife? Idk.
I snuck out three pillows from the hotel i was rolling so hard. They are like little clouds. I regret nothing.
Jesus Christ. Even your cock has to be an overachiever. :-(
I took the beard trimmer to my balls this morning.\nMuch blood. Much blood from my scrotum.
Randomize
