I don't usually arrange sex via text message
the guy working at the drive-thru just asked me if i wanna bang after he gets off work tonight.
given your current drought situation, im genuinely curious to know what your answer was
i told him maybe and gave him my number. sad? probably. but even if the sex is bad maybe i'll get a free burger out of it
I just saw Sharon Stone's cootch in high def. I think I'll stay gay.
She said if it slipped out one more time she was going to duct tape it in her vagina
I think I'm going to die by hangover. I'm in my spanish class. So I guess I'm going to be muerte.
My chemistry professor just asked me if I ever found a ride home from the bar last Saturday
He fell asleep and they duct taped him to the floor. He's pissed.
Okay, lets just agree to keep all cutlery related activities to a minimum.
I bought a 9 dollar purse from payless so if I throw up in it tomorrow, no biggie.
YOU GOT KINKY WEIRD ICE CREAM HEAD ON FRIDAY DONT EVEN COMPLAIN.
Hey so I just want to get straight to the point it was me who ate the last cupcake and it was your sister who I fucked last nigt
SORRY! Pervert came out for a bit. BAD PERVERT! BACK IN YOUR HOME!
Just finished two pages in like 20-30 mins bitches SHWAMP DRUNK LIBRARY SHWAMP
Still no second date. Guess you shouldn't show guys your taser on the first date.
I just ordered cookies for delivery. My life is falling apart.
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