i also saw a trio of peacocks walking along a sidewalk in hollywood today. i really hope im not tripping.
I may or may not have screamed I'M ON A BOAT while having sex...on a boat. I think I was born to have sex with him.
I'm a big fan of 2 things right now: 1) Gatorade and 2) the fetal position
Only you could manage to look like a complete slut while wearing a turtle neck.
And then she proceeded to fling her bra around while screaming the rocket power theme song, still managing to not fall off the skateboard
I fucked him in the bathroom at Cedar Point. if it hadn't been for me already combining my two favorite things in the world the whole bathroom thing would have been a little disgusting.
I have no idea. After the fireworks it all went to shit. Do you know why I woke up with a road sign?
in a thick russian accent she said "im not so good with english, much better with dick"
I gave you a piece of bread to sober you up. You wiped your face off with it and then gave it back to me.
Yeah. It's just like I have his virginity and he has my shoes and where do we go from here.
YOU MAKE ANAL SEX SOUND LIKE A SPORTING EVENT
Hey sorry about last night. can I come pick up my tooth?
Fuck the walk of shame. I make this shit glorious.
The fact that you arent wearing shoes probably just adds to the classiness
Condom wrapper stuck to my shirt ups the anty
When he pulled out it sounded like a balloon deflating
And to be clear I have only watched porn like 3 times at work
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