what if the hokey pokey really is what its all about?
My butt just had a miscarriage. It was yours. I'm sorry. You would have been a great sexually confused parent.
I'm customer of the month for a 3rd time now at the Wine store. I've achieved so much in my life
Just took 11th shot of tequila. I may puke in my bear head.
she was using bread to soak up the vodka off the floor then proceeded to eat it.
WERE YOU GOING TO TELL ME THERE WAS A LOAF OF BANANA BREAD IN THE OVEN BEFORE YOU LEFT FOR A 5 HOUR SHIFT??
The entire time I'm blowing him she's in the back seat lecturing me on the reasons why you're not suppose to do that while they're driving...
I'm naked and wearing a cowbell.i love med school.
why would you automatically assume i'm high...
you just told me you're eating the powder of a lemonade mix.
Good news! I don't have Hep C! Better news! I still hate you!
Big girls don't cry they get day drunk
You thought you were drunk? I woke up at 6 o'clock this morning with a cheeseburger in my left hand a drink in my right with my window half way down. it was raining.... fml
YOLO is a great motto until you end up with Chlamydia
OMFG I JUST SEARCHED DILDO ON THE WORK SHARED AMAZON ACCOUNT!!!!!
If history is any guide, his morals are no match for my tits
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