Um, that's called prostitution
Not if I leave it on the nightstand, then it's called cab money
I think he may have called me a bar rat, jokingly. I said i was but in a non-trashy way.
Just scheduled a cocaine deal around my drug counsler appointment. Why yes, thank you, I do enjoy the irony that is my life.
In case you were wondering, my scare crow is wearing your outfit from last night.
I know it's not standard practice to meet the couple you donate to, but i'm curious as to what kind of people saw my picture and said, we want that girl's eggs
He came, while we were making out fully clothed. I'm going to write a book.
Got drunk and tried to deep fry burritos. Turns out wild turkey isn't a good replacement for vegetable oil. Nearly burned my house down.
Sober people should be as daring as drunk people more often, because honestly the fact you’ve lived so long is a sign that anything is possible.
So... Really random... You know we only exist cause Dad misspelled 'perseverance', right?
I gather from Facebook you got drunk last night and took semi naked pictures of yourself?
the reason i can drink whatever i want and you have a limit is because whiskey will never make my pussy not work
you made me suck your tit in the car and kept saying "good boy. I love you so much. good boy."
There's something really beautiful about walk of shaming past the Capitol.
I'll just go on tinder. Seeking strong male to help take apart ikea furniture and move. I'll touch your dick.
One time she showed me her pierced nipples in our high school locker room and now she has a daughter
There's nothing classy about a pregnant girl at a frat party...remember that.
Randomize
