Should I ask him to prom mid fuck? That way he has to say yes.
I just know... :) goodntight
Whoops, meant "goodnight", but the other is true too.
I thought stuff was gonna go really bad after he filled the super-soaker with kerosene. but it all turned out pretty well.
I woke up using a pile of socks as a pillow. I think theyre clean so thats a plus.
I love you. Thanks for all the blowjobs.
my mom was by far the drunkest one there. best impromptu wednesday afternoon party ever
I fail to see the problem of enjoying a glass of wine while I poop...
the point I'm tryimg to make is that you didn't need to take the whole box in with you
I'm wearing a dinosaur hat bikini cone bra over my shirt. So good things are happening
I JUST HAD A FLASH MEMORY OF DOING A SHOT OF WHISKEY WITH MY BEER YOU WERE SUPPOSED TO PUNCH ME IN THE FACE TO PREVENT THAT FROM HAPPENING.
I woke up with his condom in my mouth. I actually use them now you should be proud of me.
Is it bad if I just put band-aids over my nipples? Way too hungover be dealing with a bra
apparently when a guy says "if there's anything missing in your life, I will provide" he's not expecting attractive lesbians to be the answer.
jesus, I think that canada gold metal game has completely changed all rules of acceptable drinking habits, I was fucked untill noon and I just got invited to go party when I get off work...at 600am...and NO ONE understood why i was hesitant
I know he works a lot but c'mon man. I 69'd you the first week we boned. Put a little effort in. Fuck.
THERE ARE LEGITLY 4 SEPARATE BITE MARKS ON MY DICK. WHAT. THE. FUCK.
Legitimately*
Go fuck yourself
Randomize
