Boobs. All I remember is boobs.
I would pay so much money for a video of you fucking a sheep
Aj and I already plan to tape our thumbs to our palms so we know how it feels to be a t-rex.
Thank you for making it possible for me to get laid while having peace of mind my dog is well taken care of.
I went to pick my brother up downtown and I stopped at a red light a homeless old man comes up knocks on the window shows me his penis and then screams money
And as cleavage season comes to a close, so blooms a new season of yoga pants. And the people rejoiced.
We have a vagina exchange agreement. Neither of us can hook up with any of our own law firm's summer associates. So we have a scout and referral program and invite each other to the other firm's summer events. Criss-cross!! Works every summer.
He's holding a pee stick. Yes it's weird.
New low. Just realized I hooked up with a guy from Grindr in the hallway of a building my great grandfather used to own..
Are you sure he's still you're boyfriend when you're sober?
The only downside to doctor sex is that getting choked with a stethoscope leaves marks.
I renamed some of my contacts in my phone before passing out and I have one I cant figure out, its "fucking house elf scum"
Everytime I give him head I make him rub my back. Teamwork at it's finest.
Well, why would you bring gelado into a strip club?
He tried to do a JoJo pose and wound up breaking his wrist in the process. Truly a story for the ages.
Randomize