i just passed a truck with a bumper sticker saying "i'd rather be cummin than strokin." god bless the midwest.
I didn't know that people actually queef. Is this a real thing?
I believe so, yes.
Would you be offended if I asked if it has happened to you?
I love Welcome Back Week...No I wont accept your god but i will accept that hot dog
should my penis look like a turkey
four guys that i have slept with have come into my job today. FOUR. i feel like it's like bring your sex partners to work day.
So I think his penis grew over the weekend. Is that possible or does absence make the dick grow longer?
I had 800 mg of ibuprofen 2 b vitamins and I'm pounding water like I'm trying to win a hazing
My dad, when he got home and saw me loading a bowl in the living room: "We have TWO beautiful balconies to get high on and you pick the couch?!"
It feels like New Years Day all over again...me trying desperately not to throw up in the backseat & mom and dad blissfully unaware in the front
They're having lesbian sex while I play super mario world. I hope they like the music
Hey man, sorry about punching you in the face, also about turning the shower on you. I just really wanted you to drink some water.
His water bottle is sitting on my coffee table like a monolith dedicated to the things he is not doing to my vagina.
I can feel your movements against the shared wall we are leaning up against. It makes me feel as though we are one. Queue Pocahontas song...
I made out with a guy who was dressed as Borat
And like a minute in, I was like oh fuck what am I doing
Did you run away?
I DANCED AWAY.
I know how vodka works Grace. I'm drunk, not stupid.
Randomize
