I just saw a girl play flip cup with only her tongue
I'm in love
i dont know what it is, i just found it in my pants.
HE had a tribal tattoo tramp stamp, jasmine.
I just made this asian woman on the boardwalk that was giving 20 dollar massages upset after I asked her if a happy ending comes with it.
i would have smoked before this dance, how ever i have surgery Monday and I looked up weed and anesthesia and fatalities was mentioned, so i decided that it would be a bad idea
probs a good idea
i like the whole idea of life and being alive
you sure you're not high?
i just uploaded pictures of my nephew, and you & d puking in the same toilet. i think i should keep them in the same album. show my nephew what he has to look forward to.
Woke up in a kilt. And it's not my kilt. Drinking was a success.
the beer staff turned into a beer spear way to quickly
The bartender just legitimately thanked me for breaking the cycle of speed metal by playing mmmbop.
i don't think that has ever happened before in the history of man
Ten minute nap on a staircase honey badger don't care
I love you. Mom got to wasted at the wedding that she threw up on my shirt.
Of course I have to cross through a walk for hunger
coughing up blood. I'm leaving for the doctor now. P.S. I just won $350 on the wheel of fortune machine in the casino.
You hit a new plane of existence as we all watched in awe
Drunk sperm are not productive sperm.
Not my fault people bought me shots. waving a shot in my face is like waving a cock in yours
Randomize
