As your boss, I feel obligated to tell you that turning our management meeting into a kegger may just be the best idea you've given me yet.
this kid just offered me adderall in exchange for my meal points. college at its finest
She got all mad because she said it was "unprofessional" to tell my manager to go fist herself.
come on down! you are the next contestant on the night is drunk!
Almost told my boss I was an expert aat swallowing when he questioned my ability to take excedrin,xanax, and a vitamin all at once. It was a medicinal gang bang lubricated by arizona tea.
Tomorrow is Have Sex and Climb A Mountain Day. We have amazing dates.
i would have fingered myself to death by now but the dog wont stop staring at me
I just shit my pants and had a heart attack. Simultaneously. May or may not be related to this game.
I'm drunk and I have your birth certificate
I have a pair of clean panties in my purse. This is having your life together.
There is a video of you making out with him, flipping off the camera, and holding the plastic flamigo that you had just stolen out of a yard
I just want you to make me second guess my worth as a human. Is that too much to ask?
For future reference: When the bouncer is approaching you to remove you from his bar, you don't respond by taking off your pants.
Aww you are cute. With your penis. And failures.
ALL I WANT IN MY MOUTH IS A GLORIOUS COCK SMOTHERED IN CHOCOLATE. DICK AND CHOCOLATE; IS IT TOO MUCH FOR A GIRL TO ASK FOR?!
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