I'm sad I can't be there is wknd, I'm laying on the beach and daydreaming of you / crying a bit
I'm watching a porn and daydreaming of you. Sounds like we both need Kleenex
Just woke up wearing a top hat and simpsons boxers. i also found more money in my wallet then what i had before going out, about $1000 more
I got it! After our exam we take shots for every question we skipped!!!
I don't wanna die...
You are beautiful! I got thrown out of a bar tonight for throwing my shoe. It was at my sister, I don't know why they were mad. I know her.
I'm pretty sure that when my parents bought me those savings bonds they thought it would go towards something useful like tuition. Not your bail.
I told you I'd buy you lunch.
Realistically anyone can come I don't care it's Boston what do I own boston? No. I just don't want people who are gonna give me "why are you doing that" kinda look when I take birthday shots out of my birthday babe shot glass necklace.
He always takes home straight guys. He plays One Night Stand on Ledgendary Mode
Post walk of shame: realized the underwear I put on when I left was another girl's underwear.... woof
We hit a deer while we were singing an acapella version of "I will always love you"
Dude, where are you?
In back
of car
... whose car?
Dude... I had a dream that I was getting high for the first time. I got to experience my weedginity again. It was glorious.
She was way too drunk so I dropped her off at her house and smoked a huge blunt with her mom.
idk how many shots you took between 2:39 and 3:05, but your message went from "Please text me tomorrow." to "Why you sto textom?"
You told everybody that you were a dragon and then projectile vomited all over the kitchen.
Is texting an old booty call with "can you still get your ankles behind your ears?" an appropriate way to reemerge into the singles scene???
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