so all night Ive been that girl with her tits out @ the bar. I mean I dropped jaws, yo. But in a classy way.
How wet are you?
Ever heard of a U-boat?
I'm passing your future prison.
I brought up my Bobbly Flay drinking game in the interview. Of course I got the job.
Had a speaker in class today. She asked whats the first question when you see someone pregnant. I said whos the father? She was looking for "is it a boy or a girl?"
were drug buddies, doing lines off her ass is just a bonus
In hindsight, the torn ligament in my knee is probably the fault of the ginbucket and jager bombs starting at 3pm. I guess I'll stop blaming it on you.
I don't fucking care about the convenience of not having freudian slips. I spent 2009-2011 screwing around with 3 different Daniels. 2012 WILL be the dawn of a new day
How about a mike?
Already had two of those
Turns out, his fucking is as lame and staggered as his NFL career.
So in Aca Taco on grad night 1am, this bitch walks in alone drunk as fuck in her gown to the front of the line and says, "I graduated today...thank YOU"
I just really hate taking care of things... If I can't fill it with liquor I'm not sure what to do with it.
My cat took a shit on the guy who passed out in the bathtub
Hahaha wearing a fake moustache in public was the best idea i ever had
I'm pretty sure she tried to draw a self portrait out of her vomit. Then you tried to help, but passed out in the vomit.
How is there a hawk inside this house? More importantly how the hell is he handling it without any gear?
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