Black lace...the rest is up to ur imagination
Wearing these hooker shoes was a mistake
Sandwiches are there for you when porn isn't.
Blowjobs in the shower are a lot like blowjobs not in the shower. Awesome.
I just got a high school volleyball teams practice cancelled because I slept with the head coach through their practice time.
it was like getting a handjob from robocop
im looking at burger kings website. there isnt one anywhere close to where we were last night. i think it was sent from heaven
you almost dropped the shot glass then you thought you were such a hard ass for catching it that you slammed it on the table and broke it
I don't know what kind of soup they made, but it smells like condoms.
fell down stairs ended up in underground bar now im dancing with trannies and best night of my life. lines of coke
Anybody can graduate from college sober. You try it while being stoned every day for the last three years. 2.75 baby.
It's gonna be me and some oreos tonight. Basically like sex
Just a reminder- you dropped broccoli in my car and then felt bad for it and named him Henry
I know. I miss henry.
I'm in love. Her name is Jamie. She's beautiful. She punched me in the face.
I am no longer embarassed by my vagina
It concerns why you would be in the first place, but I'd rather not know
Randomize
