You know, as long as there were ice cream breaks, I would totally eat chips for a living.
When are you freeeeeeeeee?
My phone auto corrected that to freeeeeeeeeedoooooooooom. That's kinda awesome.
I had another sleeping on concrete incident.
The bottle I was drinking out of splintered on the bottom, there was glass in my hand, I pulled it out with my teeth... Not the best night for Drunk Kevin
Jail wasn't bad. Was poppin Xanax the whole way there
Succesfully slept on the roof at work for 3.5 hours without getting caught. I need a promotion
You crawled through a doggy door 5 times for a shot if cheap vodka.
Shit stained towel. The very symbol of how much closer we are as friends. Fall 011... beautiful disaster
Making a me burrito to ward off the cold...and the aloneness of my vagina
I woke up this morning half naked, smelling like an ash tray, with an empty bottle of jack next to me, and now someone named Dora the anal explorer is texting me.
How do you get kicked out of 3 different Subways in one night..
Not very gracefully, that's how.
we went to go get waffles and then i sucked his dick in a parking lot. average tuesday.
Is it possible to hurt your vagina working out, because I think my Dumbass accomplished that... 😯😟😒😓
Do I even want to know?
yea, she was legit pissed that her rasberry vodka ice cubes never actually froze. but we couldnt convince her otherwise.
the teacher told me he was disappointed and when I asked why he just shook his head. remember that kid that caught us having sex behind the school? pretty sure that was his son.
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