is it bad that i kinda- ok, reallyyy don't remember having sex with him last night?
the truckdriver in the lane next to me just looked down and motorboated in my direction.
i just unintentionally masturbated to my own facebook picture
You called in. Quitter. You stayed at home naked drinking again didnt you.
My only expectation is honesty. And three orgasms every time.
You know you're baked when you feel your throat closing up from an allergic reaction to the pecans in the cookie you're eating but you keep eating the damn cookie.
The brazilian leg lock that the stripper put me in was definitely the highlight of the night
Does it qualify as sexting if you're both pretending to be fictional characters?
I'm not sure whether to be proud of you or weirded out.
Just saw a rice crispy commercial and got emotional. I need to go home.
Just got referred to as "the girl from Tuesday night" at the Taco Bell drive thru...what happened on my birthday?!
We single women of America need to make America great again by refusing to fuck anyone who supports Trump.
We are gonna have a bake sale and the preceded will go towards the abortion
Just finished 151. Eating nutella off a spoon. Bring condoms.
My ex boyfriend just amazon primed me a vibrator...guess I seemed stressed?
Is it a bad thing when vodka doesn't taste like vodka anymore?
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