You were pretty fucked up... decided playing hopscotch down the stairs was an excellent idea.. it was extremely entertaining
No. one of us needs a degree and I am already the alcoholic friend. I can't do everything
I love him. He's like the father I never had that I kind of want to fuck.
I just used an app to identify a song that was playing in the background of a porno. May god bless your soul steve jobs.
my self respect just called, its having a good time without me
I'll tell these girls I'm like the pet adoption center...don't play with it if you're not taking it home.
Just ran four miles to popeye's. And back. Dedication.
all im saying is that if he was a normal person, he would have fucked me by now.
Ok, gonna go sleep cuz my brain wants to be smart and not follow my pussy into the danger zone
Found plan b box covered with blood. In kitchen sick. Pickle jar is empty. Wtf happened?
That's what tomorrow is for. It's like bloodletting. Except with shame and liquor.
Hungover, threw up in a cosmetic case in my car this morning. This is real life.
I guess that means I was blowing a nerd last week.
And loving it.
you ever just feel like an organ is failing?
Because you touch yourself at night.
...What time of day am I supposed to do it?
Randomize
