is it wrong that I prefer my women with low self esteem and a smidgen of an eating disorder?
I just used Master P to describe what sound the letter U makes to my daughter...
Just saw a man in a wheel chair using his feet to push himself backwards through a crosswalk... good morning Atlanta
I call biggest shit show at the party. I welcome all challengers.
phone sex would be way better if there was an app for that...
There comes a time in every girls life when she must use her boobs for good instead of evil.
Your pregnant arnt you
I don't remember her missing an ear while we were at the bar
We are two peas in an std pod
Who cheats on Christmas eve? It's just asking for Jesus to hate you
I would have to gauge my vagina to make it fit.
I wrote my name on his balls in sharpie. In the homosexual world that's like a diamond ring. Shits permanent.
I just found a plastic cup with panties inside of it. Let's play CSI.
I'm on day 4 of clean eating. I call it the "whore by June" program
It's like I'm getting a welcome home parade with sex!
You threw him in the dryer?
He went in of his own accord. Mumbled something about experiencing the blossoming of popcorn.
Randomize
