hi i'm bored and kind of... in a sort of dirty mood
pics
no i'm at a mixer dressed up as the teenage mutant ninja turtles
his ringtone is the jonas brothers. get me the fuck out of here NOW.
sometimes when i'm walking through campus i wonder how many of these people have seen me puke
i cant finish this easy-mac because i need it for a chaser.
you passed out when you kept trying to hold your breath during the underwater scenes of 2012
im probably the most hungover person watchin icarly right now
I'm just saying, asking "Are you happy with me?" during a handjob is simply unfair and scientifically inadmissiable.
Im tired as fuck but i cant leave him here like this i gave him the acid and i feel the responsibillity to put his mind back together its fun im an architect about to about to construct a whole new belief and moral system inside this soul. Talk about the best psychothearpy
I need a straight guy to pretend to be my boyfriend for 30 minutes so that I can pull off an act of petty vengeance. Interested?
Some girl dressed in nothing but Wonder Woman underwear and a cape on her ass just started twerking all over us. Remind me why I'd never been to a midnight of Rocky horror before?
Idk she didn't seem that weird to me but I had just eaten an entire tray of jello infused with liquor so I could be wrong...
Well. At least he's a gentleman. A gentleman satanist.
Could you just like have a friend who feels bad for me and secretly always wanted to have sex with me
Look, his dick is so good at being a dick that it makes me see God. And I don't even believe in God.
If you wake up, and some of your hair is singed off, it probably has something to do with the lit cigarette you put in your hair. You said it could double as a bobby pin...?
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