**** and his GF asked me to give his stuff back, and they would give me a 100. HA, they dont know I have it to charity haha
gin and tonic in a mug. no limes so im using canned madarin oragnes. classy or trashy?
homeless.
So what if i'm late to spanish tomorrow. who the hell cares. i don't even speak spanish.
It's a bathroom floor kind of morning.
Birthday Treasure Hunt was to follow the clues. At each spot there was a stick on tattoo and a shot and at the end there was 2 cases of beer. I have 13 tattoos and don't remember turning 18.
I know. I know. The man who pulled me from my mother's womb was the same man who had his fingers in my vagina today. My life is a joke. I don't know how to feel about this.
You're just mad because I look hotter in my mug shot than you do in yours
Rumble strips road head = magical
Your dress got me laid by one of Obama's Secret Service members. Patriotic duty, check.
I think I have to break up with him. I just cried, not moaned, screamed, etc, cried, with tears of sadness and disappointment when I came.
Some girl woke me up at 1:30 am looking for weed and the next thing I know I'm in a hot tub with 3 girls, 2 40's, and a blunt.
You don't know what lonely is until you've came in an Arby's Napkin
I was really proud of me too last night! Found a discarded hamburger that I have no memory of at the foot of the bed. Instead of a Dude. I'm really growing as a person
2016 is coming through for me, I'm renaming it the year of great dick
I threw up soo much that I started crying. Then his grandma randomly came in and started rubbing my back...
Randomize