I'll buy you a vibrator, we can get married for tax benefits, and live happily ever after with lots of doggggs.
To answer your question of whether I "went back," tits just informed me I was kicked out for falling off my barstool and passing out on the floor...
ok please explain why some one shaved half of my pubes?
I just don't see what's wrong with carrying a water bottle around.
It's not the bottle. It's the fact that you're drinking wine out of a sport bottle at 9 am.
Your scrotum should have touched every square inch of that place by now. Start with the water fountain.
Long labias. Talking about. Too drunk to explain. Tomorrow.
I booty called her while she was in labor.
Just had Jager bombs for breakfast with her roommate... I do not regret this newfound lesbianism.
Know anything about my roof collapsing last night?
Tequila.
I also have bagel bites. I know that's not as big an incentive as the cocksucking but.....
When I came out of the bathroom you were naked dead asleep on the couch but your dick was still rock hard standing straight up. I almost took a pic. It was impressive.
as a self proclaimed hoe im ok with a lotta things but that is not fucking one of them
You were drinking tequila through a straw.. and kept waving your arms at me and getting this intense stare down as you muttered something about jedi mind tricks.
Thanks for not letting me get involved with a serial killer. That's true friendship
I don't care. It's wine Wednesday get your gameface on.
Randomize
