only if we run a train.
done.
i'm really high, and this is sooooooooooo important. how many frosties does it take to fill a bathtub?
look, i may have sacrified a 20% assignment for a sprite. this is what hangovers do to me.
Stop making all the ice cubes only big enough to fit in your bong. It takes like 3 trays for a glass of ice water
The coffee from our coffee maker just hasn't tasted normal since we made Mac n cheese in it that one time....
Did I ever tell u about how my buddy fucked peter coors's daughter and made a tshirt that said I TAPPED THE ROCKIES with her picture on it?
lets just use each other and get past this awkward stage. forget my name.
Am I the only one that feels like there are hundreds of tiny people having a rave and stomping and kicking around inside my head this morning?
6 beers and it feels like I've been drinking water... Daiquiri time
Super stoned right now. And I stared at my exit, thought to myself "hey self. That is your exit" and I kept driving right past it.
Nothing like banging your nurse in the shower while staying in the hospital
I was told to keep my leg elevated. I assume it means to keep my legs on the air, it's like I was prescribed to be slutty
You stopped making out with some rando guy to tell him you weren't sure about your sexuality then proceeded to follow me down the street to make out with me
All I've had to eat today are potatoes...and by that I mean vodka and chips
You'll be pleased to know I just had an elaborate day dream about your penis. you were there too.
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