i fuckib htae you, you church bitch.
These guys are walking up and down the hallway yelling, "Yo, is this the floor with the unisex bathroom?"
His hands were made for my vagina.
If it wasn't obvious enough to the cops that she was drunk, she threw in, "I like the colors of the lights because it makes purple."
It was all cool until he grabbed my vag and started screaming: THIS IS MINE.
He was in Alberta for less than a week and is already banned from 6 bars. I fear for his general well-being over there.
Why is hotel staff askin about the blood in our room
I left my bra and a book at his place. He's a hot Scandinavian who is into physics and computers - had to step up my game.
I made out with an Italian cab driver. Not cool. Help. Good news he will drive us anywhere we want to go as long as you cook food?!?!?! I want to melt into the pavement.
Don't wake me up to tell me to cook for you because you don't like taco meat.
Nobody likes ball hair. Not even gay dudes
Sooooooo, can scratch getting a pelvic exam by a man dressed as Woody from Toy Story off my list.
You need to write an essay about this experience.
He was even wearing the hat.
I always knew ther was a reason why we're best friends
Obvs our love of drugs
I like to think of it more as our love of curiosity
Dude, the T Swift concert might not be so bad after all. Can you say milfs living vicariously through their teenage daughters? Score.
still drunk.please come get me.he kicked me out because i couldn't stop laughing about passing out in the middle of taking his virginity.
Randomize
