The stories of what you did in Cuba got home before you.
at which point I apparently ran in and shouted "I made the sex with that one!"
tell that swedish kid i didnt take his shotgun. he GAVE it to me.
sticking your hands in the toilet to wash your face is not acceptable. ever. i don't care how drunk you are.
she just punched a dude and called him a peasant for not drinking fast enough in flip cup.
someone made her a trophy at 4 in the morning and presented it to her in the bathtub
Omg do you remember last night you kept pointing to your vag asking who wants to play this like a fiddle hahaha
Thankfully US customs doesnt have a checkbox for bringing semen into the country because my hair would still be in CDC quarantine
i've created a new STD.
The amount of knuckle children I've had to the Farrah Abraham sex tape is disturbing and impressive
I should probably stop recommending my dentist to the different guys I'm seeing. That could be awkward in the future.
Operation rebound complete... I fucked the bouncer
My mute roommate is using sign language to ask a guy to fuck her.
I don't know. Seeing the vagina stretched out beyond normal proportions is like watching your favorite superhero die.
should i feel bad about fucking you on my front lawn the day before you set me up with your best friend?
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