yo im tryna cop a beej tonight
If I remember taking any of my finals after tomorrow night, it will not have been a successful night.
My nipple rings set off the metal detector at the courthouse this morning.
He dropped me off at 4 in the morning because I made fun of Pearl Jam..
I am literally hand feeding my crying ex boyfriend taco bell. What has my life become?
I plan on being naked for at least 2/3 of the wedding.
We could be hammered at a childrens film. You failed me
So I'm sitting at my desk and Thunderstruck came on my iPod. I then proceeded to drink coffee every time I heard thunderstruck. Who says you don't remember anything from college?
Why do you need me to cover for work?
I wouldn't say NEED but lets just say I smell like guacamole and semen.
the manly guy you want to date so badly? he's at the club. as a drag queen. wearing higher heels than you own. think about that.
I'd just like to formally thank you for the size of your dick. The gods must really love you.
On another note- any interest in going to a gay bar to hit on 19yr olds?
why is there a wheelchair in the hall and why does it look like we banged in it?
Thinking about wearing all black to the bar tonight since I'll be attending my liver's funeral.
he just sent me a dick pic, it highly resembled a cheese stick
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