You were parading around the bar chugging girls drinks and then asking them if you could buy them a drink. It was actually genius
And if not, hey- I've never had a restraining order before, so that will be cool
It could be our claim to fame
Done. I'll pack a cooler.
I think I'm making progress on my commitment issues. I drunk made out with the same guy from last semester this weekend.
Hey man, sorry I chased you around the house with a small table.
DON'T LET IAN EAT HIS PEANUT BUTTER!!!
Just remembered that I poured a whole bottle of tylenol in there. It's chunky. It's deadly.
Drunk me needs to be reminded of my sexual preferences.
at least it wasnt animals
I feel like I got run over by a bus full of inebriated Scotsmen on the way to a soccer riot.
Giving you good advice and being naked are not mutually exclusive.
No one's ever called me intergalactic cocksucker, before.
What does it say about me that I feel completely charmed right now?
All I'm sayin is that I don't want to raise anything. Or deal with anything. Or having anything come out of my vagina. I mean, I don't think that's asking too much.
She just asked me if I was going to stay the night. I responded "I know that we are upside down".
My ass is in a myriad of pain right now
Lesson learned - Taco Bell before a long night of BDSM is a BAD idea
Can I come over and get it in, take a nap in ur bed, grab some poptarts and then leave?
You haven't lost that air of class about you...
I have a whole new respect for her. She chugged half a bottle of jack daniels, and then peed all over his wall. Serves him right.
Everybody at Lexi's party found out I'm both a screamer and a moaner after he ate me out on the pool table downstairs. Just another sunday night in Alaska
Randomize
