Opportunity cost of getting to econ after a night on the town > marginal benefit of attending class
Class is significantly more awkward when you know that your teacher knows what you look like with your legs behind your head... Just saying.
What's he like?
The usual. Sarcastic, dark, full of fucked up emotional problems that result in fantastic sexual prowess.
My TA just came over to give us drugs. Now he's drinking grey goose with my roommate and explaining his thesis to her. This is too much.
Just saw a homeless man taking a shower in someone's sprinkler system....
You obviously dont comprehend the level of insane i operate at
I just heard "I just let you finger me on Megabus, I clearly don't have standards".
He asked if I smoke and I said "only fools like you on the basketball court!" Then I started crying. I think I'm about to have my period.
I slept with him that night and I'm not sure if my lack of enthusiasm was obvious but I found him eating ice cream in the bathtub the next morning. Mom will be so proud.
I love when groups of boys part so I can walk through. It's like a red sea of penises, and I am their Moses.
I told my manager I was trying to conserve my energy for date night/Sexual Olympics later. That's legit for another break, right?
you never un-have a 4some
And no one can masturbate with the sound of Bernie's voice in the background
So, I ran into Garrett last night in the laundry room.
Oh really? First post break-up run in. How'd it go? Awkward?
Um. We had sex on a washing machine.
PLEASE LET MY BIRD FUCK YOUR BIRD
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