If you're really into hairy Serbian chicks, Cleveland has a lot to offer(216): We're going to cougar night, the serbian chicks are the best aged.
my elementary bus driver served me drinks last night. He hooked me up
At first I was confused when I woke up with shards of glass and pickle brine in my pants. But then I remembered I hung out with you last night.
We woke up in an inflatable kiddie pool full of both empty and full beer cans. In the middle of his dad's office. Oh, and we were locked in. Nobody remembers.
well, 500 bucks doesn't grown on trees, and i need that bear suit for any chance of vagina access.
I've decided, even as much fun as it sounds, I don't care for his sodomy box.
I love you more with every blowjob.
You should write for Hallmark.
Embrace your curves. Cuz we're too poor for a coke habit.
Well, that was my first dog walk of shame. Nothing says "I've got my life together" like an inside out shirt and a baggie full of dog shit.
If our sexual relationship was relative to the Harry Potter series, I would have claimed the Wizard's Cup at least ten times.
I will have you know I turned Latino David Arquette down for sex because he's married. Total. Moral. Victory.
Flo's in town, ain't she.
Virgins should have to wear a badge. This burden is too heavy...
I woke up to his balls in my face, so naturally I limboed under him and headed to the bathroom. When I came out he was asleep on the floor.
my bed is a shrine, and I am its goddess.
I'm having leftover pizza for breakfast. I'm clearly not the greatest at this adult thing.
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