normal stoners make pot brownies. gay stoners make pot chocolate covered cherries on a cinnamon graham cracker crust which by the way are very effective.
It was the single greastest thing to happen to my dick ever
i dont know why he would complain when i touch him there.
I'm gonna play a drinking game called "Sarah takes the train"
I love Japanese schoolgirls with short skirts riding bikes on windy days.
You're never coming back, are you?
My hand is eating my burrito and not saving any for my mouth. TRIPPPPPPPPPPPPPPINN!
She's in the middle of blacking out but is singing Mariah carey songs. Hitting every note.
someone lit off fireworks while I puked in the street. I was like congratulating me for making it through homecoming.
Tell him I'm the girl who was excited he spoke English. Then ask him where he picked me up from.
Yeahhh, apparently my brothers think its ok not to check on me if a creeper is talking to me bc i "like those weirdo types"
Yup, two strangers look up at each other and realize the only connection they have is the dead woman they banged to death below them. Magic. They have to be best friends now.
I might run out into oncoming traffic. Id rather break my legs and/or die then continue with today.
Please tell your friend to stop shitting in my closet.
But I thought it was so funny last night
You also thought you were a gypsy mermaid last night
Bro I just got a hand job playing tiny wings.. Hell yea
Randomize
