So it's 10:55am and I just woke up on the floor in the hallway on the4th floor. There should probably be no moredrinking competetions.
After I told my husband the docter shot me in the ass, he said - oh they can but I can't?!
He just knocked over the beer pong table... I haven't seen so much fail in one room since I watched "Mall Cop" with my grandma
Man now I have poo on my blackberry!!!
brownberry?
Just tried my new showerhead. Sex with Brian will never be the same.
If i pass out for a while at graduation, please atleast TRY to wake me?
I found his retainer in my ass crack. It smells like shame.
The party got busted because you two got caught having sex on the neighbors trampoline, come on man.
He threw up the X he took like 30min before then when we thought his antics were over... BOOM! He tried to pee out a light he was holding.
I got eye-fucked by an 80 year old man wearing a cowboy hat while I was singing country. How do you think karaoke went?
she's unstoppable after she starts doing shots and yelling NANNER
have you ever seen all dogs go to heaven this is important
I just really hate taking care of things... If I can't fill it with liquor I'm not sure what to do with it.
Comedy Central is in dire need of more sitable faces late at night - Trevor Noah has a baby face - there are federal rules against those types of sexual fantasies
I just lost my handcuff virginity and not in the sexy way.
Randomize
