My girlfriend figured out who you are.
walkin home..,.jsut saw the cheshire cat
watch out for the queen of hearts
fuucck i forgot ab her
We just saw him running from campus police a few minutes ago. So no, I don't think he's still passed out on the quad.
i just opened a bottle of wine with my dads power tools
his profile picture is him throwing up "#1" hands after his lax championship next to his coach that i fucked....embarrasing for him, yet ironically beautiful for me.
It was worse than when we pepper-sprayed my dick. I feel mislead.
Guys, I'm sleeping in the BOYNTON LAUNDRY ROOM. if you can, come let me out in the morning as I have no keys. I might be in the study room possibly. DON'T FORGET. I will be trapped
because drunk making out is frowned upon in museums i think
there's a strong possibility i came on your eyeliner last night bathroom sex was unplanned and rather messy sorry
It's been hot as balls outside. It's like getting tea bagged by the Sun.
After her AA meeting, she was on the phone with her mom, and when she said, "they're making me start over with Step 1," I quietly sang, "cut a hole in the box".
I apologized to him for my lack of boobs after he felt me up
I can't help you right now because I'm shaving my feet...like a lady.
On a scale of 0 to Thanksgiving, there is no amount of food that fights against tequila.
Look, if this is a cop, just lemme know that Mike is ok. Fuckin all star game
Randomize
