He's on drugs...like drugs for horses.
I had five suicidal voicemails from him when I woke up this morning. They all started and ended with "DON'T FUCK MY ROOMMATES".
It was only one, it doesn't count.
It's sad the highlight of the night was you didn't electrocute yourself again.
seriously. next time...underwear. I'm not spending any other holiday season wondering if it'll be my last babyless one.
Fuckers are stealing our internet and making my porn stream slowly so I changed the password for VanceRefrigeration to RyansaCunt. No spaces but capitalization.
Im about to smoke a huge bowl. My penis is so happy. Who needs girls.
He looked like he was trying to woo a lady version of himself by playing goblin music on his guitar.
Yeah its great. Whenever we want a new bowl we hand it to Trevor and he clears it in one hit. Definitely one of the benefits to having a swimmer in your circle.
Out of everyone here, the sober one caught the cat on fire.
i woke up with fake boobs glued on my chest and a large black dildo on my hand. then i had to dress myself and walk home. people saw.
She knew the head wasn't all that so she gave me her taco. I'm will in to give her a second chance.
MY LIFE IS A TRAINWRECK THATS ON FIRE BUT SOMEHOW STILL MOVING, I HAVE THE RIGHT TO SCREAM OUTSIDE AT 2AM
I'm no longer puke free since 2013 am I.
I think I had sex with a seagull last night. The window is open and there a feathers everywhere.
it looks like a nuclear can of fuck blew up in here
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