Do you think red sox nation has an official powerpoint template/memo format for resignations of manny support, bandwagon applications, and other official business?
First thing I heard on the radio when I got in the car: "humans and dinosaurs used to live happily together"... I need to stop listening to Christian radio...
she is the kim kardashian of front butts
I had one margarita and got the worst headache of my life... its like my liver has senior week ptsd
I'm still trying to figure out how you came back with chinese food, and a spoon covered in icing saying 'cake..'
You'd be surprised at how many crooked penises are out there
Seriously. There are at least 10 other people drinking at the bar with me at 10:40. Im justifying it with the fact that I've been up since 5am.
I may be asexual, but I owe you a solid from yesterday. I am a man of my word.
Dude, she had a pound of gunpowder in her closet. I for sure got a fear boner.
I feel like him using the excuse "I'm not a fan of lying" to stop me from sleeping around is hypocritical since he's cheating on his wife with me.
Oh yeah I meant to tell you the Tomb Raider looking girl so crop dusted me on the stairway
Woman doing my Brazilian right now says to tell you she says hi...what has our life come to?
But he said I was unpatriotic for not having sex with him. What was I suppose to say to that?
The expiration date on my 40 is the same day as my 21st birthday
Don’t get me wrong—I love silver and bracelets—but handcuffs are not a good look on me…
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