Bring booze and chicks. Separate, or one already in the other. Your call.
I guess i tried to text 911 last night with "someone stole my bong." Thank god that doesn't work...
No one goes out in public like that, unless they do anal
do you realize that she was the awkward lesbian in high school and now bangs more girls than probably both of us combined?!
It's Christmas week. I wouldn't know what to do if i wasn't hung over.
Bachelor party turned 19 hour search and rescue in the mountains. nbd
This guy keeps going off in the metal detector. When is it appropriate for me to punch him in the throat just in case?
he forgot we were at my place and not his so he tried kicking me out of my own apartment by saying "so, you can go whenever you want...."
That would be a mascot riding an ATV at a semi-professional hockey game, if that doesn't sum up how I've been I don't know what could
She pulled me up to my feet by my hair. I thought it was you for a second. My drunken angel savior.
is it acceptable to cross the border for sex?
So apparently, after 11 beers, 2 pitchers of sangria and 3 rhum & cokes, the idea of popping a load of MD and jumping on the trampoline, in the woods, in my underwear was the best one ever.
DUDE!!!!! THERE IS A MIDGET HANDING OUT RICE KRISPIE TREATS!!!!!! WHERE ARE YOU WHEN THE COOL SHIT GOES DOWN???????
I wrote him a note at the end of the final. I'm hoping I can flirt my way in to an A or B
I didn’t want to see that boob. I told her not to show me but she said “no, I’m going to show you”
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