Hands down the best time I've ever had barfing.
I woke up this morning and the first thing i saw was the harry potter tattoo on his left butt cheek.
I am tired of kissing girls with mustaches.
Its that time of week again, Bad life decision wednesday
How can he have such a manly penis and baby hands?!
everything was going well until edgar threatened to handcuff the security guard to himself.
RA chick in a Christmas onsie chased us up 5 flights of stairs. I need to stop violating guest policy
You were crying because you hate wine coolers but you really wanted to prove you could finish it
Might I also add after my boss threw up in the garbage can and yelled puking rally, he dougied, then told me I wasn't about that life.
He ate the contents of an ashtray and didn't puke, I think he can handle drinking a fifth to himself.
there was so much lube in my brother's closet...
Yep. The ghost of my sex life is in your house.
i can believe you didnt get any, i was wing-girling the shit out of him
all you did was repeatedly scream GET IT IN
Sorry you ended up in detox. It's not my fault you decided to walk downtown in only your underwater at 3am. I think the tequila took over.
Access to a Target is paramount to my general happiness and self-worth.
Randomize
