Found out why they call her Halfpipe Jenny-NOT the cool reason we thought
I love that the power of margaritas brought us back together.
Please don't drown this weekend. It would be a shame to lose a dick like yours.
You're in the clear; you and Andrew did not joint fingerbang that girl on the dance floor last night.
The night got interesting when the random guy next to us handed us a bottle of champagne and the rest of his ciroc bottle. When we asked why he did it, he proceeded to point at his friend who face planted the floor.
So unless we're getting married, I can't see him cry AND have sex with him. It just doesn't work like that.
all i've had to eat today is leftover bday cake and a shot of tequila.
welcome to college.
Yeah, we agreed, but I feel like I need at least one more ride on the bonecoaster
In my defense, there are at least three ways to die doing that, and I'm still here. America, Fuck Yeah!
Your poor dick will look at you and scowl for all the abuse he's going to take this week.
Keep in mind this was 2012... YOLO was a very new concept.
You seem to be avoiding the poop question. How did you poop on your hand?
High me is so sweet. She left not-high me a fortune from a fortune cookie and 6 packets of soy sauce in my tampon drawer.
I just ate part of my sock, this has got to stop.
I tried to get the guy I like to “spit shake” on a sexual bet... why am I such a bro fml
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