I woke up in a stranger's bathtub with a broken shower curtain as my blanket.
So she is eating her margarita with tortilla chips....like using her chip as a spoon
She threw up everywhere and is crying about a fictional character who died on Grey's Anatomy
he referred to my room as the tit cave...
he even offered to make my bed in the morning.
I puked in the pool and didn't tell them, then they all went swimming. Is it dick to just sit back and enjoy the show?
This is a whole other level of drinking. Like the I used to eat paste with these people kinda drinking.
well if I unknowingly shoved my hand up someones ass, I'm glad it was yours
andd if someone unknowingly shoved their hand up my ass without me knowing, im glad it was you
Life lesson today, a six foot hot guy I meet at a party CANNOT fit on my bike with me.
More cowboy butts than you can shake a stick at, oh joy.
It was disgusting, and I would've rather licked the condensation off the windows instead, but I figured that's wasn't very ladylike
Either I think of sex like a man, or all the men in Vegas are women.
How are you getting in?
I know some influential drag queens
You're the second person to offer to fuck me in the bathroom at work. Idk whether I should feel honored, or if cvs is just a turn on.
You can't talk like Dr. Evil to me five minutes after the greatest orgasm of my life.
Randomize
