whjeg hajt iyt
say what?
wanna hang out?
i found your underwear in my bra... i dont even remember how this happened.
shit. all i remember is the look on your moms face.
whatever, you made your decision to be a responsible student and where did it get you? a pushed back exam and no blowjob.
I realize now that I left my pants on that table in the downstairs bathroom at you house on Tuesday....
they just started filling water ballons with vodka.
on my way.
Nobody knows who the hobo or dude who whipped out his balls is
I'm doing shots of jagger in dixi cups and making a lesson plan for my 8th grader summer school class. My life is so close to adulthood I can taste it
When he wears his hair down and sandals, he looks like Jesus. A Jesus I would fuck.
That's not what Jesus is for
I dnt think she needs convincing on the threesome part, it's the threesome with your roommate situation that needs some work
About to be a 4Loko vomit fountain in 45 seconds, what color will it be? Animated birds will fly out of me.
did i make more ranch sandwiches last night
you had 4
Lemme put it this way babe, at point you were naked in Target.
Where were you?
Laughing
So you let the Viking explore your nether regions?
I don't think I have face palmed that many times in such a short period. And I've worked tech support.
Where can I buy a stripper pole at midnight on a Sunday?
Randomize