Pussy?
how
Wat do u mean how?
Have you ever noticed every guy named Shaant has scene hair and date girls with racoons stripes in theirs
His name should be shouldn't
is it bad that i regret hanging out with a girl tonight because that means i have less time to sit on youtube watching xmen cartoons?
As im putting my laundry in the machine, i find a solo cup and a pong ball that i signed babe ruth
I woke up in the penthouse and did lines off the to of the fireplace. This is not real.
Quick question: how long can sperm live in a rug?
It's been two days. My balls feel like watermelons.
there is a money trail leading from my bathroom to my living room.. the trail ends with a half eaten bag of chips with a note that says "magical chipz".. who am i?
I always ask when they're due. It's the nicest way for me to let her know the rest of the world can tell she's putting on weight too
Check having sex on the rocks and dirt on the peak of saddleback mountain off my list.
I felt like a god.
Well let me fuck you while I make potatoes. It's every girls dream
passed out on bart again and decide to bike home. biked thru a goat farm of angry goats, biked on the freeway, got stopped by the cops, and sat shotgun in the squad car while the officer driving got a video on his iphone of his partner riding my bike on the freeway.
So the next time I search for "Dragon Dildo" on my phone, I should probably clear the browser before handing my phone to someone and that's the first thing they see haha
sarah's view on last night: a threesome to make things less awkward. oh, well done.
The weirdest part of it all was wondering if I was going to take off his fanny pack or he was before we fucked
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