You drinking a lot?
No.
Define a lot
i got pulled over in my 'cops love me' tshirt. he didn't think it was funny when i pointed it out.
I have one brief flash of having his dick in my hand. that's all I remember.
having sex with him was like banging macgyver. he did the most amazing shit with the simplest things
Are you still giving blowjobs?
Who is this?
How dare you send me a picture after midnight that isn't porn. You know the rules.
do you ever get flashbacks of ppl you had sex with and just shudder at how gross they were/how drunk you were?
story of my life.
The bartender from Thursday remembered me... And gave me a FLAMING BUCKET of alcohol.
guy next to me on the train just pulled out two bottles of gin and a block of cheddar. is slowly making his way through all of them.
So...guess who had sex tied to the ladder of a caboose under the stars in Joshua Tree? This bitch
I've got to stop being so hungover that I puke in the fine establishments of this glorious town.
Preface: Im drunk. But i think id make a good assasin. That is all.
You were in no condition to manage a 3-way.
I'm really sorry I bit your mom last night, it was completely uncalled for.
Noooo no no no no. She scares me. She means business. She wore a diaper when we went to the bar.
Randomize
