Yeah, she'd be cute...but she has faith. It's a problem down south.
Man THE POSTAL SERVICE is awesome when I'm high..... But they suck when I'm sober.
i dont know what to do
with your life?
no, with my silly bandz, im already wearing 3
My walk of shame got a new perspective when I walked into his livingroom and found his roommate fucking some chick on the coffee table.
I will not fill you in on the details until we get back, so do not ask. I got peed on by the girl I was hooking up with last night.
My god. His mom just smacked my ass. Does this mean I'm accepted??
I'm drunk off vodka and I haven't eaten today. I've never felt more like Kirsten Cohen in my life.
The number of males in the usa getting circumsized are decreasing. Keep this in mind when we become cougars
Sorry, all I could picture was you jamming your dick into a lemon.
Hey start looking around for a low rider Subaru. Well get a loan. It will be capital for our first music video.
She makes him look at her naked pics before she sends them to someone she's actually going to fuck. I think this makes him mayor of the friend zone.
Was so drunk I had to masturbate face up cuz I thought I was gonna be suffocated by the pillows.
I just sang Hey Jude with a homeless man and then we drank beer together. Then I watched asians take pictures under a xmas tree for an hour and fell asleep in an MGM Grand bathroom stall. #AloneinVegas
Maybe she'll change her mind but the "go fuck yourself" doesn't seem promising
I just want to sing to him and rub baby oil on his head
Randomize
