The way white people respond to them, you'd think Journey was the president of Caucasia.
Tell mom and/or dad that I am going to be home late. I am really blazed. Don't tell them that part, though.
I never thought I'd hear the words "aww you pulled out" and "you're so sweet" in the same sentence.
She wanted to watch a Baby Einstein DVD while we fucked. I'm pretty open minded but that felt a little creepy.
yo dibs on the gosselin haired one.
a girl just walked by me crying on the phone saying, "all I ever do is menstruate"
We are possibly on our way, unless we see the limo full of strippers.
New level of stoned. My Terry's Chocolate Orange didn't 'whack-and-unwrap' so I ate it like an apple.
I don't know how we managed to stay up but we actually sat in front of her open refrigerator for god knows how long while she ate salami straight out of the package with her fingers and I laughed. It was a trainwreck.
we were looking for paper towels to wrap his hand and i yanked a drawer out of the cabinet, it was fun so we just kept doing it. things escalated and long story short, he isn't gettin his security deposit back
She jumped on a table and took off her shirt and started yelling things that no one understood. For being 3, she has a dead on impression of a drunk party girl.
Yeah no problem. What are blow job angels for anyways
He said that he made a girl squirt to the ceiling and I got curious
then I ended up getting a lapdance from my TA...I love college.
Dude, I'm sorry if you saw me getting head in my truck last night. My bad.
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