Wow i just got reported to security for being a homeless person trying to break into the library.
Her life must suck. All she's got is "Miss Shamrock" WHICH SHE LOST!
so im decorating easter eggs with my family and my mom is writing "Jesus is risen" and "God loves you!" on the eggs. i wrote things like "I'm naked!" and "there are drugs in these eggs!" on mine.
..i think i can hear you losing your virginity
why does the wii remote smell like your vag?
I mean two cocks this time. Trust me, I'm not gonna pull the same stunts as last time in this situation
My fall semester strategy is to submit my papers with a nude selfie
You've got post-grad studies written all over you
You also proposed and then tried to jack me off
Nothing makes me prouder to be liberal and socialist than the idea of desecrating the memory of Ronald Reagan
Man, coughing on your period is like the biggest gamble a girl can make.
I literally just woke up in a dog bed, in a bathtub in someone else's house...and I'm not wearing pants
it's the international house of making me almost fucking shit myself
All I remember is that I was trying to call my wolf pack by howling.
Coffee and girl scout cookies. Breakfast of champions.
Get fucked.
People probably think I’m a fangirl bc I go to so many shows but it’s really bc I like fucking the tour manager
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