Did yall have sex?
Well we both woke up naked and there was a condom wrapper on the floor, but I don't remember so does that count?
Def not... that's how I managed to keep my number under 10 for all of college- If you don't remember, it didn't happen
Instead of a promise ring i got my clit peirced, its a promise that ill always give you ass! =]
if i wake up one more time on my porch im gonna start considering myself homeless
Moral of the story: don't get pregs or your chances in the beer league are over
just spent $80 on an im sorry breakfast from mcdonalds for everyone sleeping in my apartment for being a drunkass and locking everyone out of the apartment at 2am.
I'm missing some hair, but it's cool. Breadsticks are done.
Pretty sure the purpose of joining wine clubs isn't to drink the 2 bottles they send you each month IN THE SAME NIGHT.
You were riding my three year old's train yelling, 'I think I can, I think I can!!'
I thought I could.
Cat. Why do you sit on things I need to use.
Because it is cat.
He told me I was his first American. I feel like I should've brought a flag to plant on him.
How is it possible that I'm still a virgin and you've managed to have sex in a cheetah print onesie TWICE
In her defense, she didn't know I had a twin brother. Plus, we're even: I banged her sister.
Tbh you just need to fuck it out like I don't know another solution
A girl just managed to steal a whole gallon of ice cream. I'm letting her go because that is impressive.
He stood up through the sunroof yelling "CHOCOLATE MILK BITCHESSSS!!!! YOU AIN'T WORTH SHIT NOW!!!" the sad part is he wasn't even drunk yet. I worry about him sometimes.
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