he got wood on it!
i know. i had to sit in his lap on the plane. he also wore teva sandals.
...i was talking about hockey
I'm the only one here who isn't hooking up, coming out of the closet, or crying because of one of those 2 things.
Make me a promise>>> if you ever see the brats from that tv show NYC Prep walking around, you will trip them, and you wil throw drinks on them
Any time you start making pro wrestling references before 10 PM I know that I'm breaking up a fight between you and some muscled up frat boy you call Hogan.
So Delta doesn't take cash. I used my card to buy a drink and asked the attendant if she could leave it open.
We smoked a joint and talked about his parent's divorce. It was like being fifteen all over again.
Dude you went around coming up behind people and whispering in their ears. I dont know what you said but they looked terrified when you left.
My ex was there, the 2 girls I'm seeing showed up and I had a pocket full of VIP passes 2 the strip club. Had all the makings of an epic night but I fell asleep at the bar.
WHAT IS PROPER BONG ETIQUETTE FOR WHEN YOU'RE ALONE IN YOUR BATHTUB AND CRYING?
You know you're fucked up when you decide to pour fireball whiskey in your vegetable beef soup
But I got head on a boat yesterday which was sweet until a bald eagle flew over. Then it became life affirming.
Ran up to the dollar store to get batteries for my vibrator. Happy Valentines Day!
You know, finding my first grey pube at 34 is FAR more distressing than finding that first grey hair at 13.
I DO NOT FUCKING WANT OR NEED THIS INFORMATION!
Let's just say I peed the bed last night, and I wasn't in it alone. Whoooops
My fuck it list is complete! I finally got a firefighter!
Randomize